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Wednesday, May 17, 2006

ABORTION 2

I remembered an intimate situation I found myself 3 weeks ago and I decided to share it with my dear readers on the premise that it might be useful to someone;

I got out of my BMW on this fateful day when a brand new Avensis swept past me to park in front of me in my office garage. I tried to peep into the front car and I was amazed to see my former colleague nodding steadily obviously in tune with music blaring out of his CD. He had just moved from Glo to a bank; immediately he saw me, the glass of the car automatically wound down and an uncontrollable splash of air conditioning breezed through my already frigid skin. He immediately invited me to have a ride in his new car but our conversation was obstructed by my other colleagues who rushed for his attention.

I was immediately jealous and I felt so down that I hurriedly walked away from the scene to my office toilet. On closing the door to the toilet, I could not control the anger I felt as they kept pouring out. I immediately comported myself as the following conversation ensued between God and me;

Me: Why God? I have been praying for a promotion, but you have not done it.
God: Is there anything too hard for me to do?

Me: No, I suppose but you seem to favor some people over me.
God: Those that compare themselves are not wise.
Me: Please, how do I gauge my progress in life? I am not comparing myself, I am praying for something I need.
God: Then what are you doing feeling sorry for yourself. I have given you various opportunities to be promoted but you did not take them.

Me: What?
God: Remember, when I told you about the “automated routing” you were to propose to your boss but you ignored it.

Me: I did not know you were the one speaking to me.
God: You did, but you ignored it because you were afraid of how it will come out.

Me: Yes, I was afraid of being rebuked but I did not know it was you. If I knew, I would have boldly stood up because I could never disobey you.

God: Remember, your undergraduate days when you had a hunch to read some particular part of your physics note and exactly all the things you read came out; that was your first A on the campus. Am I right?
Me: Yes, God. Was that you?
God: Remember, your first day at Student Christian Movement fellowship and you felt at peace with the environment though you were a Moslem.
Me: Yes, were you the one?
God: Remember, when you finally broke up with your first fiancée. Who comforted you?
Me: I was traumatized Lord, that was no comfort.
God: You soul was shattered but your spirit was intact, this was necessary for maturity.
Me: Okay God, you speak in various ways.
God: No, I speak to you in patterns you understand; they may come in various forms but my sheep know my voice.

Me: What am I to do now?
God: I give seed to the sower- meaning anybody that is actively sowing seeds; I don’t give the fruits.
Me: But I pay my tithe and give offerings in church.
God: Giving offerings and paying your tithe is commendable but I am talking about some other forms of seeds. I do not owe any man; when last were u sick? When last did you quarrel? When last did you have an accident?

Me: I am very sorry Lord, but I don’t understand. What can I do to be promoted like my colleague?
God: You do not know what you ask for. Can you drink of the same wine he drinks from or be baptized with baptism he is baptized with?
Me: Yes Lord, I can.
God: That means you are willing to sleep for only 2 hours in a day. You are willing to write various business proposals and see them thrown to the drain by various investors until you can get it right. You are willing to invest your life savings in high risk ventures and lose it various times till you get it right. You are willing to look at your wife in the face, and put her money in places you are not comfortable with.
Me: No God, that’s too much.
God: This is why you should not compare yourself with others but compete with yourself to reach the goals I give to you.
Me: Okay, I understand.
God: I have given you everything that pertains to life and Godliness. You aborted the idea I gave you, if you had obeyed the idea irrespective of your boss compliance, I would have led you to a higher dimension with me. If Abraham had aborted my ideas, there would not have been an Israel. If Jesus had aborted the idea of not dieing, I doubt I will be talking to you today. The light afflictions you are facing now are going to work out for your eternal glory.
Me: Oh God, I am very sorry for aborting the plan you gave me?
God: Do not despise the days of little beginning. Just like I told Moses; the rod he used in tending for his father-in-law sheep is the same rod that he used in delivering the Israelites. The way David looked after his fathers’ sheep conscientiously is the same way I knew he will take care of my people when I make him King. So Dipo, whatever is in your hand, do it with all your heart.
Me: Ok Lord, I will.

God: Do not abort this idea, they are for generations unborn……………...

NOTE: All these conversation with God took place over a period of time.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

LIAR LIAR

This life seems to favor those that live a lie; living a lie or telling a lie is about the same but before I delve deep into this very controversial issue that denies us from reaching our full potential, I would love to define “lie” as inscribed in the Encarta Dictionary;

1. deliberately say something untrue: to say something that is not true in a conscious effort to deceive somebody
· He lied about his age in order to get into the army.

2. be deceptive: to give a false impression
· Don’t forget that appearances can lie.

The above definition (1) talks about deceiving somebody as an act of lie but the greatest injustice someone can do, is to lie to himself/herself. Let me use these three scenarios of my acquaintances as a background for my discussion;

1. A colleague of mine, a Moslem brother who had gone to Mecca twice, left Nigeria to the UK for his MBA. His first day in the city that hosted his proposed school, was spent in a restaurant where he was treated with ham. After eating it, he proclaimed he had never had anything so delicious and promised the waiter he was going to be a regular visitor. He got to his apartment and quickly checked the dictionary for the meaning of ham; he was full of rage when he discovered he had eaten pork. He quickly went to the toilet to vomit it; after clearing his bowel, he went back to his room and took a can of beer with ease and comfort.


2. My former boss, a devout Hindu brother, left Nigeria to Paris for his usual business deals and he was offered Chicken in a restaurant by his host company. He immediately looked around critically and realized there was no Indian in the room. He had chewed the chicken half way when he noticed the representative of the host company was eaten vegetables; he quizzed him on his prefrences and the man boldly announced he was a devout Hindu.


3. A close friend, a devout born-again Christian, told me she refused the position of chief bride’s maid for her best friend claiming the proposed bride was pregnant meaning she had sex before marriage. One year after this incident, my close friend told me she was separated from her husband and was filling for a divorce. She immediately added that another friend of ours was getting married but this friend of ours was pregnant; she poignantly said she would not be found dead in the wedding.

These stories, if examined deeply, are symptoms of schizophrenia and this condition should be taken very seriously. Joseph Conrad’s “Heart of Darkness” specifically talks on human denial of the monsters within them which ultimately leads to our destruction and low self esteem. The ability to recognize these denials are the major difference between man and animal. No wonder, Jesus admonishes us to remove the log in our eyes before we try to remove the speck in others. The frailties of self denial are vivid enough in example 1 where a Moslem brother is permissive of what is comfortable and denies the uncomfortable. As a Christian convert from an Islamic background, I am very certain that beer is frowned on by Moslem with the same degree pork is frowned on, then why is the Moslem brother above comfortable with the beer?

The second story was conveyed to me by the actor himself and I remembered how he laughed at himself for not being bold enough to proclaim he was a Hindu who did not care to eat meat in front of other fellow Hindus but the last story was the height of self deception. She could not examine herself to recognize her own sin though she strongly judged others.

I am beginning to worry if “murder” is a higher degree of sin than “lying” because lying to oneself is an offshoot of pride which the Lord resists. I believe we should quiz ourselves from time to time in order to examine ourselves deeply. I will recommend this film “CRASH” (Academy Awards’ Best Picture) as a resource material to further expatiate on the paradox of human deficiencies.

What is the solution to all this? I strongly believe we should acknowledge our weaknesses and not to quickly judge others no matter the situation. If we view others with this lens, it will become easier to accept other peoples frailties and the commandment of God will be adhered to which supports loving your neighbors as yourself……………………………………………………………………….

Please, kindly trap your ideas on the comment section.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006


ABORTION

Today is my first day on vacation and I was troubled with the news a young friend of mine brought to my attention at 11.00pm Nigerian Time, 1 week ago. I was quickly alerted because prior to this said date I have not heard from her for about 3 months.
My troubles came as a result of an internal turmoil from indecisiveness to maintain a stand on the issue of abortion………………….

After my young friend revealed, she was pregnant for a close friend of mine, who denied out rightly the responsibility of the child. I became angry, not with the two of them, but with my inability to come to a resolve on such issue; am I for abortion or not? Is it as easy as that, just to fall on one side of the divide or worst of all to be on the grey side of taking a stand and say things like it depends on the situation? I am a strong proponent of sticking to a principle until a higher principle causes me to re-think such principle but abortion always seems to throw me off.

Steven Covey’s book, “The 8th Habit” pointed out that the three constant elements in life are choice, change and principle but I am not comfortable with the element “principle” because I strongly believe it changes in perspective over a period of time. I have been a sticker for “sowing and reaping”, “friendliness breeds more friends”, “a reader is a leader”, etc but when it comes to issues like “sex before marriage” and “abortion when you are not prepared” poses a challenge to me because of the pros and cons of either stands you decided to take. This becomes frustrating to me when I asked my young friend what she wanted to do about the situation, she did not hesitate to say she wanted an abortion giving reasons like she was in school and she was not particularly in love with my close friend. I bided time for a favorable response by telling her to call me back.

Its one week today and I am still indecisive. I decided to take a feminine perspective by asking my wife; my dear, was I surprised by my wife’s legalistic stand of “abortion was wrong except it endangers the ladies health”. Believe me, I was seeing my wife in a new way as she strongly opposed the prospect of abortion with series of evidences and stories; my wife has always been endearing to people and less principled on human issues but on abortion, her stand was forthright-no to abortion.

This caused me to take a long walk on a Monday morning, ruminating on the issue. After about 5 kilometers of my walk, I remembered a story by my mentor, Deolu Akinyemi, during a bible study meeting in my undergraduate days, which caused me to re-think on my stand of “no to abortion”;

A guy staying in Nigeria, who immediately after getting married was sent on training in the US, for six month without taking his wife. On the night of arrival, before sleeping with his wife, armed robbers attacked his house and raped his wife. This ghastly incident resulted to a post traumatic syndrome and eventually made the wife pregnant. I believe you can imagine the crisis this would cause in this couple’s home; what would you do in such situation. Let’s analyze the three choices that are open to this couple.

1. They keep the baby and the child becomes a constant reminder of the unfortunate night. The child will always cause a strain in the relationship especially to the man. Can you imagine the child 24 years after, asking the mother who is father is?


2. They go through the gestation period and eventually give up the baby to the motherless home or put it up for adoption. This looks good considering other options but a deeper look at this option, makes you think of the child, 24 years after, accusing the mom of abandoning him/her and bringing back unpleasant memories especially when the child asks for his fathers where about.


3. The easy way out may seem to just abort the baby but this also brings constant guilt to the mom and has its’ dangers include deeply emotional damage, physical damage to the uterus and death of the woman.

I am sure you must be overwhelmed with indecision by now, but not to worry because the consequences of aborting a physical child is not 0.5% as worse as aborting an inspired idea; this we do constantly without feeling any guilt. An aborted child ends the life of maximum six children at a go but an aborted inspired idea ends the life of billions of people. I will expand on this in my subsequent post………………………………

Saturday, May 06, 2006


Who am I?


This is one of the most difficult questions to answer in life. As we journey through life, there is a constant demand by life issues to signify our importance in this life. The process starts from childhood when we are giving a name that is suppose to reflect who we are but we constantly behave in a different direction to the intended meaning of the name. So the question continues from our first walk, first speech, first scribble, first lie, first pain, first crush, first sex, etc.

As challenges keeps asking us to differentiate ourselves from the crowd, it seems one will never be able to fully answer this question as a redefinition is constantly sought after to move to a higher level of growth. So who am I? I quickly recalled my interview with the chairman of Globacom, Chief Mike Adenuga JNR, asking me to define myself; I quickly blurted out my academic history and professional accomplishment to him. Is this me? I seriously doubt it but the man seemed to be very impressed as he gave me the job over about 60 MBA graduates seeking the same position. As I researched for an MBA programme in Stanford, I was again faced with the same question but this time there is no hiding any history of mine; as the question states;

What matters most to you, and why?

This question forces you to take a deep survey of you life history and trace every dot that was very impactful to you. This question makes you x-ray your innate skill and demands an answer to why you decided to accomplish a learned skill. It makes you look at your elementary, high and undergraduate school accomplishments and every sororiety you joined during this periods. It actually opens you up to childhood experiences and makes you pick out all the common factors as you matured. Am still able to convincingly answer this question?

Lets take a peek at our dreams to define who we are. I strongly believe there is a strong connection between who we are and what we dream to accomplish over a period of 10years from now. The dream which is subconscious in nature signifies who we are when we are financially and pressure independent. This, I believe is a strong pointer to who we are, but a red flag quickly registers in my subconsciousness, reminding me of people who have dreamt of being something and are happy doing something else sfter 10 years of dreaming.

Can one fully answer this question?

I throw the question to my dear readers to comment on this page as I go on a 2 weeks vacation to ...................................................................................................................

Anyway, see you in 2 weeks time.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Are U Secure?

My friend published an article on his blog "http://www.deoluakinyemi.com/", titled "Are you Secure?

Below is my comment, so I decided to publish it in my blog.

Being a proponet of employment is not as bad as the author tries to convince us.
I will love to have a deep understanding of the message he is conveying........... so I will ask questions;
1. Does wanting a permanent job over a contractual job reveals the state of mind of an individual with regards to dependence or independence?
2. Are we all created to be enterpreneurs? Do we all have the same giftings?
3. Does wanting a better renumeration, training, etc from a company reveals total dependence on the said company.

My point.......

We are called to influence (lead) lives, so the pivot in which one makes this action can not be questioned. Let me use an anecdote to potray the message;

Aig CEO, M.D Access Bank PLC decided to take over a bank through cooperate take-over about 14years ago. He initiated the process by working with GTB for about 10 years and all through his working in GTB created various changes which improved the bank- changes that included better welfare package, training, etc. he complained about the system, yet having an independent spirit through his focus to own a bank.His colleagues in GTB could never have guessed his mind as he worked tirelessly for the company and he immediately rose to the position of ED in GTB. The opportunity came when Access Bank declared a public offer and the rest was history. Aig immediately took over Access Bank and he is turning it into a world class bank.

He took a route that is practically perceived as dependence but all the while having an independent spirit.

No one can judge the depth of the mind of any man. Success is an individual opton and perception. There is no general rule, the maker of every human defines his boundaries, and happiness is a choice decided by individuals.................

Below is my definition of success;
"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a little better; whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is the meaning of success".
Dipo Tepede

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Maximize Life2..........................................

Boredom. What are the solutions to this particular condition a man experiences when he is not in an excited state or place of perpetual interest. Is it everybody that gets bored?
I have attended seminars, read books and even engage in voluntary services but I still get bored. This is the time when thoughts that are unproductive fills your mind and inspires you to action regretful decisions. Is there a way to eliminate this state of mind in a persons life?

I will get back to this very interesting topic but I would love to finish my anecdote which supports the fact that a person that undergoes obstacle stretches oneself and increases in human endeavour. Just a reminder; I took up a boring job based on economic reason and came out a champion;

I take time out everyday after rendering service to customers through telephony to analyse the kind of calls I receive. After a month of analysis, I found out that 90% of the calls were issues surrounding Profit Max Plus- a product that was majorly used by Commercial Telephone Operators (CTO) for commercial purpose. The basic information sought for by the CTOs are their daily usage for the month in anticipation for the double bonus promised them by Globacom; if they could use a maximum of N30,000.00 worth of traffic. Due to this development, traffic into the call center was very high and invariable more CCRs were employed but the traffic remained slow and the task became more daunting.

I immediately sought for an alternative to solve the CTOs issue. I proposed a scheme where the customers could easily obtain their information without calling into the call center. The scheme was based on convenience and free access which will encourage the customers to use the scheme. The scheme was a USSD solution where customers type in a number, using the line they wanted the information from, on the phone and immediately their present usage for the month was shown to them. This made me popular to management and I was recommended for an interview as a Business Planning Analyst in Glo Gateway- the international carrier service for Globacom. This position was meant for an MBA in a prestigious university but after my innovation and 4 interviews, I was eventually offered the position.

This position was my dream job as it exposed me to International Business and made use of all my innate and learned skills. There was no economic incentive but the position wielded influence, knowledge and opportunity for continuous learning which was my basic core value. Within months, I have learned so much in business processes, negotiations, telecoms vocabulary, software acquisition, presentations, etc. The climax to the advantage of this position is being exposed to global business-I practically have to learn the cultures, languages,festivals, history, holidays of almost every country in the world in order to maximize revenue for the company. Traveling out of the country was recommended in order to make physical contacts with partners like carriers, vendors, suppliers and electronic market operators. I have decided to learn French to increase my effectiveness in closing deals especially with West African countries which are predominantly French Speaking (Francophone).

This job has given me a global perspective to life; I no longer look at renumeration in Naira but in Dollars. I strongly believe that when one endeavour to change the situation he finds himself, he is a champion. My mind has been developed, it is matter of time before the money starts rolling in. Maximize Life 3, continues..............................................